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03-28-24 03:29 PM
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Xeogaming Forums - Muses' Sanctuary - Tyler the Corporate Cannibal | |
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Squire Vince

Storm Eagle
is watching you, he sees your every move.








Since: 04-17-10
From: Victorian London.

Since last post: 4710 days
Last activity: 4684 days
Posted on 07-01-10 01:36 PM Link | Quote
No one is who we think they are. In my line of work I come in contact with every sort of person; whether they are black or white, poor or rich, man or woman. They're all the same when they come to me; no one is different. They all bleed red and they all taste like chicken, if you broil them right. I'm not a picky eater; it's whoever I'm hungry for at the time, and I just can't be stopped when I get those killer cravings.
It's Saturday, April 3rd. I am sitting at a desk in an uncomfortable suit and tie. I feel like I'm slowly being strangled, which would be preferable. My fate is far worse; a sexual harassment seminar. Shoot me. I have never harassed anyone long enough for them to feel a seminar would help. I don't want people like this. Sex seems meaningless to me. I get all of the satisfaction I need from fulfilling my cravings. To my left there is a man; his name is Jason. Jason is our new temp; God I love temps. They have become the equivalent of fast food for me. No one cares when they don't show up; we just order a new one from the agency. Jason is a tall skinny man with blonde hair and sharp features. I wonder if I could feel love, could I love him? I’m not sure; I don't think my mind would let me be gay. I have made up my mind though, Jason McAndrews, you are my dinner.
I break into the office files and take his from the large green filing cabinet, which I like to call “The Menu”. It’s a personal joke that no one but me understands. I take his file; the first step. No point in reading it again, I only take it to prevent too much evidence from being leaked. The police already have a name for me, The Clarksville Cannibal. Actually, I've only eaten three people from Clarksville, most of them are from Canturburg, but far be it from me to correct them. I go to the break room to grab a candy bar from the broken machine to hold me over until tonight. As I walk into the room I see Trisha. She was the one on the list before Jason. A beautiful woman, I'm sure that if I could love I'd love her. She says “Hi” and I give a subtle nod and adjust my glasses. She asks me to sit and eat with her, I really hope she isn't flirting. I take my candy from the machine and sit opposite her at the table. She tries small talk: "Where are you from? How old are you?" My beeper goes off just on time. Thank God for small miracles. I walk back to my cubicle and look up Jason's house. He lives in a crappy apartment on the bad side of town. Excellent.
I leave work early and drive to Jason's toilet bowl of a home. He lives in the cesspool of criminals and scum. He'll go undetected for days, maybe weeks. I almost kill myself when I trip over his damn dog. I hate animals, but the feeling is usually mutual. I scoop up the little pest and lock him in the bedroom. Then I go to the bathroom and take off my clothes. I can't get his blood on them. That is a bit of experience; my first kill left me soaked in blood. I go to his kitchen and take his carving knife from the block and wait for him. Patience is the key at this point. I hear the sound of his whiny car as he pulls into the parking lot. I hear him as he approaches the door, he opens the lock and the door swings wide open. I hide behind the door and wait for him to close it. He has his iPod on and he doesn't even open his eyes to close the door. I walk over to him. I stand behind him for a good three minutes waiting for a quick opening. Then it happens as fast as lightning. The knife goes straight in between a few vertebrae causing a quick paralysis. I drag him to the tub and undress him. Then I lean him over the bathtub and give his neck a swift cut. He bleeds out in only minutes. Then the fun begins. First I cut off his left index finger; my little trophy. In the next two hours I dismember and eat Jason, saving only the bones, hair, nails, and a few scraps for the dog. He tastes amazing, and then the craving is gone. It'll be back in a month or two but the feeling of satisfaction is reviving. I wonder if anyone at work notices how happy I am the days after I eat. I should ask Trisha what she thinks. As I pass the superintendent’s room I leave about a thousand dollars in cash, labeled rent in a blank envelope. That should keep me covered for at least few weeks.
It's a Monday, any old Monday, and the craving has come back. I knew it would, and I'm ready for it. Today's entrees are young Asian toes followed by a nice torso cooked over a flame, and to end it a nice cheek salad with delightful vinaigrette. Delicious. Then again it always is, always delicious.

Everyone is unique in their own way.

You all taste the same to me.
Elara

Divine Mamkute
Dark Elf Goddess
Chaos Imp
Penguins Fan

Ms. Invisable








Since: 08-15-04
From: Ferelden

Since last post: 73 days
Last activity: 73 days
Posted on 07-01-10 01:50 PM Link | Quote
I will clean up the other threads and title when I can log in again.

Seems interesting but really fast-paced. I think you could have done a lot more with it, and that if you get around to it you could expand it into something truly awesome.
Squire Vince

Storm Eagle
is watching you, he sees your every move.








Since: 04-17-10
From: Victorian London.

Since last post: 4710 days
Last activity: 4684 days
Posted on 07-01-10 01:54 PM Link | Quote
It's just a short story for a collaboration I'm working on.
Elara

Divine Mamkute
Dark Elf Goddess
Chaos Imp
Penguins Fan

Ms. Invisable








Since: 08-15-04
From: Ferelden

Since last post: 73 days
Last activity: 73 days
Posted on 07-01-10 02:29 PM Link | Quote
Oh, what is this collaboration?

You could expand a bit on the passing of time during the day and have it still be a short story. It has a lot of strong parts in it, and if you just do a bit of tweaking on the beginning I think it would become a lot stronger as a whole. Honestly, the ending reminds me a bit of Stitch's work.
Phoenixocracy

The one true Xeodent








Since: 01-08-10
From: Xeomerica

Since last post: 1457 days
Last activity: 1457 days
Posted on 07-01-10 02:34 PM Link | Quote
Are you using this in our collaboration? I haven't heard mention of that for a couple months.

But yeah, Vince and I have an uncanny obsession with serial killers and superheroes.

I agree with Elara, though. Work on time, and make it flow more. Is this edited from the last time I read it?
Squire Vince

Storm Eagle
is watching you, he sees your every move.








Since: 04-17-10
From: Victorian London.

Since last post: 4710 days
Last activity: 4684 days
Posted on 07-01-10 02:53 PM Link | Quote
Phoenix: Yes I do believe so. I had Josh edit it.
Elara: I will revise it and I may post another edited version.
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