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10-13-24 01:26 AM
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Xeogaming Forums - Game Over - This is going to have to be my goodbyes | | Thread closed
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Bitmap

#1 Enhancement Shaman US Ravenholdt








Since: 09-05-04
From: His Laughin' Place

Since last post: 4517 days
Last activity: 4510 days
Posted on 06-01-12 12:19 AM Link
Guys, I'm going to have to lay down something really thick for you guys. No, I'm not going to commit suicide or some other dumb shit thing some of you might be assuming. But here goes.

I'm going to log out forever.

I was thinking about this for the past week or two and it's not fun for me anymore to post. I've put a lot of effort and creativity in my posts and the only kinda discussion I get is seriously rare. Threads I make have some discussions. Sure. But it's starting to become sad that I'm the only one who puts a crap ton of effort in making threads that I've been looking at myself lately and "Holy shit...this is sad".

Like, I'm seriously making sure that I have to be creative with this. I get little to no feedback and / or fun time with anyone that it's making me look at myself and I feel disgusted with myself.

I remember two years ago I remember reading online about some dude who owned a forum and he was the only member posting in it.

The guy had 40,000+ Threads alone in this forum

I remember looking at this and thinking to myself that it has to be really sad for him to be like that. All alone in his personal little world posting away and putting forth a lot of creative topics but...he was the only person there. Talking with himself. And he was doing this for years

I'm that guy. Well, not really the dude posting alone. But I feel like I am somewhat like this guy. And I don't want to be him. I'm not having fun anymore and I feel disgusted with myself. I feel like being here, I have potential elsewhere to have fun having discussions with people who have the same ideas as I do.

So, two years ago, I joined Somethingawful and was part of internet history such as when Japan got that disaster and 70,000 goons donated to the cause. Then someone chimed in and said he would donate more money if goons started shaving their heads. And I was happy to do this, posting pics and meeting some awesome as hell people in the process.

But here? It's like I use the same skills I use while posting there and I just have a bad taste in my mouth. Well, not here but just ACMLM forums in general.

But sure, I have had some wicked fun times in the past. Like getting drunk on JUL and doing a really shitty LP of me playing Super Metroid for the first time. I remember like 15 people got on skype just to cheer me on and whatnot. But eventually, the drunken character that I was using soon wore out and things just went downhill.

Or maybe the amazing posting sprees we would have here with absolutely no care in the world.

Or hell, nights at LAN parties and making some of the worst pics ever with True and a lot of other people here. That was fun.

But I guess what I am trying to say is that I guess I am growing up. I just can't have fun here anymore. I dunno what it is but...I guess deep down inside I hate myself for being who I am here.

Facebook is starting to be the same for me as well, But thankfully I am going to be changing that soon with people I actually talk with (OH LORDY FACEBOOK DRAMA HAHAHHAHAH) but honestly, every time I visit family it's always ending up with the same things over and over "Why post about Videogames all the time?" And it leads me to tell them "If you don't like me posting nerdy stuff then stop posting pictures of shit you like and move on". It's annoying and I feel like with me here I'm the only one doing the same shit I do on Facebook. I like to share some things online and the only few people who can relate to it replies back with "Oh shit this is awesome!". Others? I know they are not interested in it. But when talking with them in person (Like actual family members) it's always brought up like it's some stupid as hell hobby that when im 50 years old i'm going to regret it.

Fuck that. I'm Bitmap. I ain't going to change who I am for the fucking world and anyone who wants to say otherwise can fuck right the hell off.

The LAST thing I want to comment on is going to be brief. I'm sure some of you guys know about what happened in my engagements in the past week but I am not going to apologize for doing that one single bit. I was raised on never starting fights. But finishing them. And I will defend myself until I am dead in my grave. There are some things I like and getting a counter reaction on the whole thing while I was the one being the bad guy? Yeah, that's not fun. That's a bad community. And I found a whoooole lot of shitty people in the process. You can call me ignorant. Honesltly, I don't care. I'm done with that place and I really

Really

REALLY hate to say this.

But I am done with this place too. I kinda need to cut losses and get my gains and leave this place behind. I've already started cutting ties with people because people grow up. They move on. They find bigger and better places. And I honestly hate myself for even making a big ass fucking thread on the whole thing.

Sorry guys. I hope you guys understand where I'm coming from. I probably repeated myself with this countless times. I'm sorry.

But anyways, I still talk with a few of you guys here. And I already got some "DONT LEAVE WE'LL MISS YOU" and I have already done this in the past. Twice.

So this is it. For real this time.

I'm...gonna have to hit the submit thread button and log off don't I? Yeah, it's for the best. I really, really have to move on.

Peace guys.
Elara

Divine Mamkute
Dark Elf Goddess
Chaos Imp
Penguins Fan

Ms. Invisable








Since: 08-15-04
From: Ferelden

Since last post: 60 days
Last activity: 60 days
Posted on 06-01-12 12:28 AM Link
You're life, your choice. We will miss you.
Cteno

Super Shotgun
Moderator








Since: 01-11-05

Since last post: 52 days
Last activity: 50 days
Posted on 06-01-12 12:33 AM Link
This goes out to you, buddy.



"On that day, we lost something that couldn't be replaced."


(Last edited by Nelrith on 06-01-12 12:34 AM)
Xkeeper_
Newcomer








Since: 06-01-12

Since last post: 4516 days
Last activity: 4516 days
Posted on 06-01-12 11:40 AM Link
Hey, a GBCW, like I expected! I'm only here because you called us out.

Originally posted by Bitmap
The LAST thing I want to comment on is going to be brief. I'm sure some of you guys know about what happened in my engagements in the past week but I am not going to apologize for doing that one single bit. I was raised on never starting fights. But finishing them.

I'm sure everyone does, considering you dragged it over here. (Hint: See Thexare's profile comments)


And I will defend myself until I am dead in my grave. There are some things I like and getting a counter reaction on the whole thing while I was the one being the bad guy?

You're a bad guy because you continued when you were told to stop. If you get pulled over for speeding, get a warning, and then proceed to continue speeding, you get every ounce of what you deserve, and that's exactly what you did.

And you ignored the message I sent, but someone on the "other side" of the argument also had their post wiped, but you continued to argue and fight while they didn't. So yeah, I guess you made yourself into the bad guy, good job. Way to go.


Yeah, that's not fun. That's a bad community.

It's called "you're an asshole".


And I found a whoooole lot of shitty people in the process.

Did you look in a mirror?


You can call me ignorant. Honesltly, I don't care. I'm done with that place and I really

Really

REALLY hate to say this.

But I am done with this place too.

GBCW!!



Anyway, this is all just because you pulled a callout stunt here. You started shit, you got in shit for it, and then you went and whined about how the big bad other guys rained on your parade.


(I have no beef with Xeogaming, by the way. Just in case that wasn't clear before, I wanted to make sure it was known now.)
Tyty

Poster








Since: 05-30-12

Since last post: 4516 days
Last activity: 4515 days
Posted on 06-01-12 03:48 PM Link
@Xk: Did you really need to drag private stuff out into public like this?

Anyways, Bitmap, bit sad to see you not here, especially with you leaving a bit after I joined, but I guess I'll see you elsewhere. Peace dude.
Cteno

Super Shotgun
Moderator








Since: 01-11-05

Since last post: 52 days
Last activity: 50 days
Posted on 06-01-12 08:26 PM Link
Originally posted by Tyty
@Xk: Did you really need to drag private stuff out into public like this?

I'm in agreement. We have a particular rule against posts like that in this subforum, but since Bitmap won't be around to see it, it really doesn't matter anymore.

In any case, I'm just going to go ahead and close this now.
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